I had a dream last night that inspired this post today. It was similar to my walk in the snow. I haven't been posting in what seems like forever. I have been really distracted. I knew I wanted to put this into a post after waking up multiple times and then falling back into the same respective spots or memories in my dream right where I left off.
Stuck in neutral again and again. Is everything that shimmers sure to fade? Reaching for something that is too far to hold.
When does it lose its attractiveness? Was that really me? How special is it really? Did I imagine it in my head? Perspective, in this case, is two-fold.
Replaceable? Substitutable? Reasonable? When does faking it become real? How long do you pretend to be something until you become it?
Which way is up when all you know is where you want to be? Which way do I go when I'm tracked in segmented succession?
Never say never? Forever my endeavor? When you have nothing to lose, how do you measure failure?
Where do I go from here? Is this forever home? When will it become comfortable again? When and how does comfortability change? Objectively or subjectively?
Its all around me. I can see it all. Like a movie I lived in, seen all at once.
Clouds of visuals with captioned lessons the whole way through. Why can't I jump in where I want to intercede?
Retrospective vanity?
Why did I grow so much to realize how much I haven't grown? Or how much I still need to?
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